I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Randomize