Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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