Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
i will never coherently bang her
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
