I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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