i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
