Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
