Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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