you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
