What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
