he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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