is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
