I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
