dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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