Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
BRING THE BAGELS
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Randomize
