Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize