I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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