smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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