I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
