I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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