At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Shame - the story of my life.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize