I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
