honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
