This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize
