Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
