i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
