____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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