billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
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