i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize