I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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