Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
