just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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