People with herpes should wear stickers.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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