so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i dont even know how to be here
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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