idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
