New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i may or may not be watching the land before time
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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