OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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