Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
