at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Randomize
