Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
