i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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