Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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