I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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