To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
