:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize