Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
