I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
