Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
My breasts were aching with rage.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
