Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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