Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
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