i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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