Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
